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Feeling The Feelings

As you regular folks know, I am knee deep in revisions (aka, sheikh torture) for The Sheikh’s Forbidden Princess (TBC). And after a bit of a slow start, the ball is now rolling…downhill…at a pretty good clip. Which makes me very happy because, obviously, I’m happier and more confident when the writing is flowing, rather than when I’m essentially squeezing water out of a rock.

But even better than it going quickly and smoothly, I’m starting to really connect to the reworking of this MS in an emotional sense. In fact, in two recent scenes, I teared up a little bit in the middle of things because I just *felt* it. In the first, my heroine believes she’s never going to see the hero again, and in the second, well, it’s when they make love for the first time. The stakes are high, the emotions are high, and I just…well, I got misty.

Does that ever happen to you? Are there moments in your writing when your heart pounds faster because the hero’s just walked in? Or because he’s just made you so ANGRY!! (as those alpha men can do!) And who do you connect with more? Your hero, or your heroine. Oddly, I find I really relate to my heroes. The fact that I seem to connect more with ruthless, billionaire alpha tycoon playboys than with the heroines is a mildly disturbing commentary on my psyche but…hey. No judgement here.

And, also, I would like to leave this video, which was the soundtrack to my love scene. Because…well…it was a desert rainstorm. 😀

Ladies and Gentlemen…Danger Baby

This is Danger Baby. I don’t really have to explain the name, do I?

New Options

So, the revisions have been slow going and a lot of that has been due to the ending. What I’ve done is, I’ve written myself into a bit of a tricky situation. Which is good, because why should it be easy? It shouldn’t be. My characters need to bleed for this love and I need to bleed…well…making them bleed. Hey, I never said I was a kind and compassionate creator. This is one of the many reasons we can be thankful that God is in control and I am not.

But I think I arrived at a solution for the problem. I was setting up a resolution that was too neat. Too pat. Especially after all of the blinking torture my characters have to go through. Longing. Forbidden lust. Forbidden love. Breaking down emotional barriers. Becoming comfortable with who they are.

It’s a tall order.

And I’d been coming up with all these new layers to the characters, all these plans for how I needed their relationship to unfold, how I needed them to grow as individuals and as people. How I needed them to connect with each other. And a lot of that worked. But, something just didn’t feel quite right.

That’s when I realized something. The resolution I pictured in my head worked much better as another layer of conflict than it did as the HEA.

Without giving away too many details…my hero needs to come to terms with his past and what it means for his future, and how he can let go of the terrible traumas he’s experienced and see himself as the heroine sees him. As a man who’s worthy of love and happiness. But I wanted him to find all of it at once. I wanted him to realize his destiny, fall in love and get married. The End.

But I don’t think that’s it. I think he needs his destiny to come smack him in the face before he’s ready to deal with it. And hey, while I’m at it, why don’t I give him the wedding before he’s ready to deal with it too. I think he needs more time to work everything out so he can have true, realistic growth.

So here’s to The Sheikh, and all the crap I shall be putting him through this week. It will be worth it in the end, and you’ll thank me for it. But don’t hate me for enjoying your pain…

5 Dollar Foot Long!

I mean…5-5-5 blog thingy!

Question 1: Where were you five years ago?
1. I was engaged, only one month away from the wedding.
2. Was working in a coffee shop for my hubby to be!
3. Was writing noir detective comedies and vignettes about the Ruch militia for the entertainment of family and friends.
4. Staying out too late with friends eating really good Mexican food at Muchas Gracias
5. Couldn’t have imagined that in five years time I would have three kids, that I would have even written a whole book, much less have two contracts. (especially since I’d never heard of Harlequin! *g*)

Question 2: What is (was) on your to do list today?

1. Keep the house from collapsing.
2. Don’t yell at the kids.
3. Stare at pile of laundry.
4. Wrestle 2yo.
5. Write. (I did all those things! I’m a simple sort)
Question 3: What five snacks do you enjoy?

1. Coffee. (I second it Jackie, it’s a snack!!)
2. Milano cookies
3. Baked chips.
4. Popcorn
5. Diet soda (what, I don’t drink alcohol, that has to count for something, right?)

Question 4: What five places have you lived in?

1. Um…true story…I have live in three locations on the same street. For the past twenty years. (I’m 24) Before that I lived on mile up the road on the hwy that connects to this road. So…Jacksonville, Oregon.
2. My head.
3. Still Oregon.
4. Oregon again, but I’ve been to Mexico.
5. Romancelandia (yeah, me too!).

Question 5: What five things would you do if you were a billionaire? (Jackie, I’m so jealous of your answers…)

1. Buy a Bougatti Veryon and crash it for extravagance. Or donate it to Conan O’Brien.
2. First, I’d be a seduced virgin secretary. (What? I had to get my money from somewhere)
3. Buy a spot on American Idol. Top ten.
4. Build orphanages and adopt lots of children. (and have a big house for them)
5. Devote my money to a research project that will make fat free chocolate that tastes just as good as regular Hershies.

I’m too lazy to nominate anyone…it requires links and it’s…ugh…11:30. (aren’t I pleasant?) So…first five to get here! You’re nominated! GO!!

The Small Things

In life, there are a lot of things that seem small, maybe even insignificant, but when you step back and look at them in hindsight, you see how they were really leading you somewhere. My life has been very much like that.

I met my husband when I was twelve, though he doesn’t remember me at all! But a few years later we ended up working together at the same place (rather, I worked for him) we became friends, then started dating, then married. All because of my very first job, a small thing that turned out to be not-so-small! (I’m not sure the initial meeting when I was twelve had much to do with anything since he doesn’t remember it…but I do, and I was quite impressed with him.)

Then there’s the writing. I’ve always written, but I didn’t know what I wanted to do. So I tried everything. (one of these days I will torture you with my noir detective comedies) And then I picked up a romance novel at a second hand store (When The Lights Go Down, by Heidi Betts) and soon after, a Presents by Miranda Lee. Then the contest. And I though, I want to do this, THIS is what I want to do. Not getting feedback from the second comp I entered led me to my crit group on the ihearts board, and they were instrumental in helping me do that rewrite on what became my accepted MS. Small things that mattered.

This got me thinking.

I’ve been really digging with The Sheikh, trying to get to the heart of things. What do they need in order to have a believable HEA? What moments are vital, necessary, for us to believe in them as a couple? They’re quite an opposite pair, my h and H. Poles apart in life experience in almost every area. Which means that a connection has to be made beyond the physical, especially in the case of these two since my heroine is the one woman my hero is forbidden to touch.

That means there has to be something so compelling about her that he’s willing to abandon a lot of tightly held morals and beliefs, that he’s willing to risk EVERYTHING to be with her. It has to be about so much more than physical attraction. And that means I’m chasing moments. Little things that build the connection between them. The shift in their relationship when it goes from being somewhat hostile, to a mutual understanding, and even liking.

It’s those little things, those moments, that will weave together and make the full picture as big beautiful as possible.

Speaking of little things, my two year old son, who has some developmental delays, and does not speak at all, said mama for the first time on Easter Sunday. And that was a thrill beyond belief. It’s those little moments in life that make it so precious. In that moment, I cannot tell you how blessed I felt. Amazing how going through something you could easily resent, can teach you to truly savor moments that might otherwise seem small.

Really, is there such a thing as a small moment?

Getting Down To Business

So, I’ve got this big ‘ol revision letter. And let me tell you, it about gave me vapors when I first scrolled through it’s length in my inbox (this is less sexy than I just made it sound).

But, I had to remember that, no matter how I feel right after the initial thud, revisions are my friend.

Then I was lucky enough to get to chat with my editor on the phone. A lovelier woman you will not find, and she’s immensely helpful when it comes to just hashing things out.

We’ve come up with ALL kinds of ideas. All workable, all interesting. And now I feel like the sky is the limit, and THAT is a great feeling. The only one stopping me from really just going in, digging deep, and making this a really fantastic story, is me.

And the major thing we covered in out conversation wasn’t plot points. The bulk of the story arc is fine. It was really getting into the characters. Their conflict. Their journey, not just as a couple, but as individuals. They need to grow as people. As individuals they have to arrive at a specific destination so that we can truly root for them and believe in their happy ending. And there is some heavy stuff with these two.

In terms of the relationship, there’s a journey to take there as well. A starting point, an end point, and all of the things in between.

So I sat down yesterday and I wrote several pages about my hero. Where he’s starting from, where he needs to get to, why he’s starting from where he’s starting from and why he needs to go on this journey. Same with my heroine. And then I did the same with the relationship. I starts with a bit of hostility, an underlying attraction, this has to go somewhere. It can’t plateau. It can’t magically transform to love. It has to grow and change as they grow and change.

As my hero opens up, as my heroine begins to find a connection with him and begins to understand her personal responsibilities, (essential to their individual journeys) the relationship will shift. Barriers begin to come down, hostility gives way to respect, which gives way to liking…which leads them to a place they are completely forbidden to go.

Once again, I’m approaching an MS in a different way. But like in real life, each person is different. Each story is different. Each relationship is different. My h and H have a seriously complicated situation, both due in part to their station in life, their responsibilities and their own personal demons. And that means I have to tackle it in a different way.

So I’m going in. I’m digging deep. I want everything these two have got and I’m not holding back.

How do you wring out your characters?

Revisions! (the musical)

Revisions for The Sheikh hit today, and I will confess, in those first moments reading through alllll of the things that need to be done to the MS, my heart sank somewhere to the vicinity of my stomach and did not settle in well.

However, I am a huge believer in revisions, and the magic of them. So instead of focusing on what I did NOT deliver, or all the work I have to do, I’m going to focus on this: This is my chance to deliver something better.  Maybe even something amazing.

I don’t just want passable. I don’t want ‘good enough’. I don’t want to pass go and collect two hundred dollars. I want to do more. I am contracted now for a decent number of books, so I have some security, but it’s not my goal to rest on that. I owe my readers more than that, I owe my characters more than that.

And as hard as it is to see my weaknesses as a writer, the weaknesses in the MS, put out in front of me in a tangible list, is not an easy thing to face. But having that there, no bias, black and white, that’s what’s going to make me better. Make me dig deeper. And ultimately, isn’t that what we want? Really, it is hard to know you didn’t nail it 100% the first time. But it would be much worse to have all that depth left unexplored.

The essence of my letter is rooted in character, and in the journey that they need take, not just in the relationship, but as individuals. And ultimately, I’m very thankful that I’ve been given the chance, and the help, to really refine the MS and take the characterization deeper.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: Revisions are positive. (granted I have teh fear and am a little skeered to look at the email again, but hey, give me a few hours…) But revisions, editorial feedback, are there to make us the best writers we can be, which is really what we should want. It’s not just about getting a pat on the back and an ‘oh, good job, it’s fine’ It’s about taking it to the next level. By performing surgery if need be.

Hand me the machete, I’m going in.

Hero Houses

So, most people cast their hero and their heroine. I don’t often do that. Typically, the hero and heroine are people who live in my mind, and no one else ever really quite measures up for me. I’ve found approximations, but it just isn’t the same. What do I cast? Locations. Specifically, houses. (been known to cast cars and private jets as well)

I love to drool over luxury real estate, hotels that are too expensive for me to be looking at. Villas in Tuscany, Mykonos and Crete. Mansions in the Mountains of Washington State and the Hollywood Hills. Penthouses in New York and Paris. I am a junkie. I will google image search this stuff for waaaay too long.

I am working on building my current hero’s real estate portfolio, so I thought I would share with you:

This is his modern Hollywood Hills mansion. As the owner of the largest media and entertainment conglomerate in the world, it’s important he have a residence here. This epitomizes his bachelorhood, but also speaks of his wealth and status, both things that are very important to him. It’s minimal, it’s clean, and above all…it looks like a man lives there. I think if you opened the fridge you’d find condiments and a six pack of beer.

Now we have his Grecian Villa…this is where he takes my heroine for some romance. 🙂 It was his intent to install her in the Hollywood home, and not in the home in his native country, which is much more personal and true to his roots.

So, how bout it? Am I the only one with the real estate bug?

Baby Update

My little one is getting big! I have some pics of the darling to share: (not of the best quality, granted, but my BlackBerry is functioning as my main camera at the moment!!)

There’s the three of them. 🙂 Aidric, 3yrs (4 in April) Alani, 10wks, Kian 2yrs

Editor Gold (Again)

My editor is wonderful, a genius some might say. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again! So I’ve been chatting back and forth with her about The Greek, and what I wanted to do with the MS, what works, what doesn’t, that sort of thing. And she said some things to me that really led to another one of those ‘aha!’ moments.

So, it’s about the hero and the heroine above all else, that I (hope!) I’ve got now, but this was something that related to external conflict. External conflict is the thing that pushes your characters together, while the internal is, ultimately, what keeps them apart.

I had these two characters developed and had their internal conflicts, and I’ve been desperately searching for the external forces to push them together. Because let me tell you, their internal issues would have them running far and away from each other at this point.

So I had all these scenarios: Hostile business takeovers, a marriage of convenience, a chance meeting that may not be so chance-ish (not a word, but bear with me).

She pointed out to me that a bit  (as in almost all) of my outline was focused on the external, which I felt was needed since I was struggling to find the action, the thing that would bring them together. She said I needed to find emotionally motivated reasons to bring them together.

Aha!

So here, from the very beginning of the MS, what I needed was something internal to push the external into motion. And interestingly, in this instance, the internal motivator of the hero will come into a direct clash with his ultimate internal conflict. He reacts emotionally, viscerally to a wrong committed against his sister, finds himself bound to my heroine as a result of his external reaction, and then, in the end, it brings up a host of other issues he hadn’t intended to deal with. Ever.

LOL! As much or as little as it makes sense when explained like this, it does to me. The internal and external don’t need to be exclusive from each other, in fact, I think it works best when they overlap, and even when certain aspects of a characters emotional drive, goals, internal issues, conflict with others that come up, and are challenged by their relationship to the other character.

Good luck decoding me with this one. 🙂

My Secret To Doing It All

I don’t. Nope. Not even close. I think I get asked maybe once a day how I manage to do it all. And I’d love to tell you it’s because I never sleep, I’m have superpowers, and I’m in possession of Hermione Granger’s time turner. But that’s not true. I’d also love to tell you that my house is spotless, it hasn’t been 6K miles since I changed the oil in my car, and my husband never has to cook dinner for himself. But that would also be a lie.

One of the lovely regulars on the blog wrote to me and commented that she didn’t feel she had very high words counts. But she’s doing it! That’s the big, important thing. Even if you don’t have a huge chunk of time to devote to writing, if it’s what you love, what you want, do what you can. You don’t have to sit at the computer for eight hours a day, heaven knows I never do. Waaaaay too ADD for that.

And as I write this, the dishes from dinner sit still on my kitchen table. I may let them sit there for a while. Till I get to them. Whatever.

My husband is a huge help too. I mean, the man did like five loads of laundry today because I was so behind. Also? He watched the boys while I went to Starbucks, and my mom took Alani for a while to help both of us out.

See? I promise I don’t write, hold the dustbuster and the baby while folding clean clothes. And I wouldn’t venture to try. And the thing is, I don’t need to!

It’s easy to get in that mindset and think “well, she does it, why can’t I??” We see these women who, outwardly, look like superheroes, that have it all, and do it all.

The truth? We’re all hiding dust bunnies (dust moats?), literally or figuratively, under something. And that’s quite all right. There’s some freedom in admitting that. There’s a lot of pressure on us to be perfect, but perfect can be kinda boring. I’d much rather have some sanity and some laughter in my life, so on that note…

I’m Maisey Yates, and I haven’t vacuumed in over a week.  But I’m a pretty awesome mom, wife, friend, daughter and writer, so I’m not too broken about it. And it’s certainly not a shortcoming.

So, to you my friends, the supermoms, the superwives, the superwomen, you don’t have to do everything. Just enjoy life. 🙂

Ihearts Post!

I have another post up at ihearts! Come check it out and say hi to me. 🙂