For Those Who Are About To Rock…
Or Pitch. Or Submit. Or just sit down to write the first words on their MS.
This post is partly inspired by the Presents pitch contest that was just held through Harlequin’s online community, and also the answer to a question from the Desire editor’s chat held on the same website this afternoon.
In the chat, someone asked what sorts of stories were being rejected.
This is the answer: Subs that lack strong character development & conflict. Stories that don’t add anything new to standard hooks/plots.
I think that right up there is a HUGE HUGE thing. Commit it to memory. Write it down. Put in on a stick note on your desk, your computer screen, write it backward and put it on your forehead…whatever works.
Because to me, that is the KEY to making a MS stand out. Character, their conflict, and then, a hook that’s irresistible. One that’s unique and comes from you, one that HAS to be done by you!
Editors see thousands of manuscripts a year. Yeah. Really. Thousands. Egad.
I think of it like this.
Editor: So, all right then, you’re the heroine, right?
Heroine: *nods*
Editor: What do you do?
Heroine: Erm. I’m a waitress.
Editor: why?
Heroine: Cos I seem to have fallen on hard times.
Editor: What hard times?
Heroine: Hard ones.
*hero enters*
Editor: Oh hi, who are you then?
Hero: I’m the hero, you can tell because I have a broad chest and a chiseled jaw. I also look forbidding.
Editor: I see. What do you do?
Hero: something in Real Estate or something. I’m a billionaire.
Editor: You and every other guy in my stack. What’s your deal?
Hero: I’m very angry and alpha.
Editor: Why?
Hero: *shrugs very broad shoulders* I dunno. I run a company and have lots of money. People constantly refer to me by my first AND last name. And I’ve been too long without a woman.
Editor: GREAT! Why?
Hero: *shrugs broad shoulders again*
I’m not in any way demonizing those elements, because hey, there’s nothing wrong with them really. But they don’t tell us much. There’s no hook. More importantly…who are these characters? Clearly, I did that in a stupid and simplistic way, but very often with category books I see in contests, the characters are archetypes rather than real people. The heroine is down on her luck, because…because she’s trying to pay for all the orphan children’s medical bills. Yes. That’s right. And the hero is an a-hole because…well, he’s Greek and handsome so, there you are.
Or, sometimes there is no because. They just are because they are. They’re a collection of traits mean to represent the sort of characters that are in ‘these sorts of books’.
But that’s not enough. And it doesn’t work. Characters need motivation. They need to be who they are for a reason. Their actions need purpose. And more than that, they need to GROW. And we need to see that growth. Because at the beginning of the book, at the start of the journey, I might have a heroine who sees herself as broken, and who doesn’t think she has a chance of having a relationship after her failed marriage. And in the end, I need to have a heroine who has taken a journey, and come out the other side changed. At the end, the loves herself enough to believe she can have a future with the hero, that’s she’s not broken, that she, as she is, is everything he needs.
Don’t be afraid to start off with them being broken. So we can rejoice in the change. So can get a payoff at the end.
CONFLICT. That is a big one. the external conflict for our heroine might be that she’s a PR specialist, in charge of making sure her clients look good. And now her major client has an issue with his image that can be solved by her pretending to be engaged to him. If she doesn’t, and scandal gets out to the press, no one will want to hire her to do damage control again. To protect her job and her professional reputation, she agrees.
Resolving the internal conflict is going to be heavily tethered to the character development we just talked about.
Now, her internal conflict is that she’s afraid of depending on people because she watched her mother have a series of unhealthy, co-dependent relationships. And it’s the internal conflict that’s going to keep her away from the hero, while the external conflict shoves them together.
Internal conflict is really important because without it: what’s keeping them apart? Too many scheming maiden aunts, or a misheard conversation and it just gets annoying that they’re still faffing around NOT being together.
Basically, if you could put them in a room together and everything could be solved with an honest, five minute conversation…that’s weak conflict.
Now onto stories that don’t add anything new. (in terms of hook/plot)
You can do so much more in category than people think. The important thing is holding to the basic promises of the line. Beyond that…we get to play a lot. I’ve been able to tackle some really great things that, honestly, many, many, many non-category publishers would NOT have liked so much.
I think the lack of originality in hook and theme can largely come back to thin, wimpy, unmotivated characters and a lack of conflict. Because you can take a very well-worn theme, like Beauty and the Beast (which I’ve done!) and make it new because of the characters that inhabit it.
You can play with a secret baby story, like Lynn Raye Harris has done in her March release Strangers in the Desert...by having the baby be a secret from the heroine! You can play with the concept of what it means for a hero to be alpha, like Caitlin Crews did in The Disgraced Playboy with a hero who put on the facade of not being terribly driven to succeed. Or with the princess/bodyguard trope like I did in my upcoming release A Royal World Apart, where the hero is a virgin whose conflict adds a different layer to a story that’s been told many times.
But infuse life into it, infuse you, give the editors something irresistible. Characters who have a personality, who aren’t a collection of traits, but are real and complex. A story that has a surprising element or ten in it.
But know these things about your MS, about your characters. And best of luck pitching/submitting/writing.
Any questions for me? Feel free to ask and I will always answer as best as I can in the comments! And, fellow category writers if you have anything to add, you can do it in the comments as well!
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Question: What are some of the tricks, tips you use to create original characters? I know for me, the draw to a character is that the last thing they want/need is to fall in love. But, the question, why is it different for “this” character is sometimes hard to answer.
Thanks in advance.
Melissa, thanks for your question! 😀
I really think originality comes largely from past experience and from how different personalities handle different experiences and feelings. Some characters might handle insecurity by trying to fade into the background while others might just say to heck with it and cover their insecurity up by being brash and in your face. Same issues, different method of dealing.
I also think a lot about how they dress, how they talk. How do they feel about relationships? What has happened in their past relationships, both romantic and with family.
I need to know all those things before I can write about my characters convincingly. And I think all those elements add up into making three dimensional characters.
I think ultimately it comes down to how hey handle things, and making sure it’s authentic to the character that’s been established, rather than falling back on cliche reactions.
Wow. good question. I had to think really hard about that! May continue to think about it…
Awesome post!! Plus I love the editor interviewing the heroine. Hard times, man, hard times…
It took me a loooong time to get the idea of characters being the ones to drive the plot. For a while there they were just a collection of traits, not actual people. For me it sometimes comes as a thought like what would a story about a professional chess player be like (for example, hehe)? And then I’d have to think about what kind of person a chess player would be. Logical? Intensely focussed? Okay, so how would someone like that view emotion? And why? And if they play professional chess, then obviously the game must be very important, and if so why? What does it give them that their life lacks? How would the kind of person who is intensely focussed and logical, with nothing in their life but the game, view love? And a hero/heroine for whom emotion is everything?
And away we go from there. 🙂
Another fab post! Thanks, Maisey 🙂
[…] Maisey’s done a great post here on character. Check it out. Posted in […]
Thanks Maisey – really great blog and I loved the interview 🙂 So good to hear what is working/what is not from someone in the know! Jen
So what if you had a betrayal happen when the hero and heroine were teens and the heroine walked away and now years later the two are thrown back together – in your opinion would this fall into the ‘can be solved in a 5 minute conversation’ and if so, how can it not be?
Jackie, your process sounds a lot like mine. Although, my characters come to me in all different stages of doneness. My current heroine is doing her best not to explain herself. Cow. :p
Lacey, thank you!
Jen, you’re very welcome.
Marcie, I think the important thing is how the incident changed them. If the hero walking away has changed the way the heroine sees herself, and men, and has damaged her ability to trust, than it will require her to really change to find her HEA. A simple explanation won’t fix her issues. Does that make sense?
YES!!! You are awesome.
🙂 It’s a question I ask myself all the time. Or maybe it’s more like a doubt. Is this character truly different? Oh, gawd, please don’t let me be writing the same character over and over again. lol
Thanks for the answer. It’s given me food for thought.
Fab post, Maisey. Also loved the ed interviewing the characters, it got the point across! Made me think back to an old (rather rubbish) ms of mine. Ed looks up as my hero swaggers in. ‘Hey there.’ ‘Hola. I am Spanish.’ ‘And what do you do?’ ‘I am a hero. I talk without contractions so that readers can tell I have a vrrry sexy accent.’ ‘And what’s your goal?’ ‘To have the sex with the lady.’ ‘Why?’ He blinks, smirks. ‘Because I am Spanish and I can not help myself.’ Yeah…I probably needed to delve a little deeper on that one 😉
Now that you’ve started this, I’m thinking I should write an editor-meets-characters scenario for my leads from now on. I’ve recently started getting a family member to interview me as if I’m my characters. Lots of questions, all sorts of questions. It really helps me think of them on a deeper level, and also gives me new ideas when I answer without thinking, and go ‘Ah ha!’
Thanks for your words of wisdom, as always 🙂
Madeline x
OMG MADELINE!!! *ded*
“I am Spanish and I can not help myself.”
You win.
Thanks for the win *hands it to Spaniard hero in half-open flowing white shirt*
I have nothing more to add 😉
Just…yes. So thank you. This is like half of my blog whinges rolled into one post!
Also…I sniggered at “hard ones.” There’s no hope for me.
[…] For Those Who Are About To Rock… Maisey Yates talks about the fatal flaws that will get a romance sub rejected, and what to do about them. Hero: I’m the hero, you can tell because I have a broad chest and a chiseled jaw. I also look forbidding. Editor: I see. What do you do? Hero: something in Real Estate or something. I’m a billionaire. Editor: You and every other guy in my stack. What’s your deal? […]