What Makes A Book A Wall Banger?
I’m reading a book that I am just not fond of right now (no I will not say what it is in public..Not HQN though!) and if this bad boy were not on my Kindle, I may have thrown it at the wall. Oh, so many reasons why. It seems like if the hero had a bunny, the heroine might boil it. The hero is lecherous to the point of being plain icky. Motivations seem to be there just to be there, with no discernible reason why…and the plot devices! Oh, the plot devices…
I’ll share a few of my serious pet peeves. These aren’t necessarily deal breakers, because, as we say in my crit group, it’s all in the execution, but I DO find some of these elements a turn off. And, well, some are deal breakers.
1. ‘Forced Seduction’. This, IMO, is rape. No means no, man. Alternately, I am all right with him taking a kiss even when she says no. 🙂
2. Multiple partners in one book for the H and h. Ew. Gross. Which leads me to…
3. The heroine being pregnant with another man’s baby and sleeping with the hero. Particularly when we’re dealing with brothers. There’s a squick factor there for me that’s tough to get through. Having said that, I have read one that worked for me.
4. They’re married and they slept with someone else. The hero and heroine separate, the hero goes and beds every chick in sight to ‘get over his wife’. Or the marriage is in name only and the hero keeps sleeping with other women. Whatever, if they’re still married, I no likey. Again, I have read a couple Presents where this worked. But generally speaking, I find it distasteful.
5. A hero who was a total jerk for 98% of the book, then says sorry, has a personality transplant, and it’s suddenly a given that he loves her. Man, seriously, if I don’t want the heroine to end up with the hero, we have a problem. A dark hero is great, a hero who does and says horrible things, great, fine, but redeem him before the very end. I have to believe his feelings, and believe the change. It’s all in the execution.
So I’m wondering, what makes a book a ‘wall banger’ for you? What are the deal breakers? The things you really hate to see? What ruins the romance? Share your pet peeves with me!
Comments
20 Responses | TrackBack URL | Comments Feed
Head hopping. HATE it. Takes me completely out of the story. Doormat heroine and her polar opposite, the ballsy heroine who is so independent and sassy she takes a giant leap into irritating.
As to heroes, well, I forgive a hero a lot. Especially if he’s a hot hero. But yeah, there’s very alpha and then there’s big jerk territory. Oh, I don’t much care for books with no hero POV. I want to know what’s going on in his head please!
How many POV changes constitute head hopping for you?
Agree on the heroine whose so ‘ballsy’ she’s a charicature instead of a person.
My love for ultra-alpha heroes means I tend to forgive a lot (except rape), but luckily most of the time the heroine is so in love, she doesn’t mean it. I still like to hear her say yes before the deed though.
I’ve never wanted to wall-bang a book until very recently. This book (which shall remain unnamed) set me up for what I thought would be a HUGE revelation on the heroine’s part. She hated, hated, hated the hero for breaking his promise to her.
Book rambled on for chapters and chapters, only to reveal the big secret – hero had promised not to sleep with her and *gasp* he DID! She loved it BUT because he promised, she walked away from her marriage for a whole year and only returned because she needed money! The whole thing was so contrived, I actually reread seveal pages to see if I’d missed something.
I was sooooo disappointed, I seriously contemplated posting a review or asking for my money back! Needless to say, the autobuy cue for that particular author has been turned off!
Okay, didn’t mean to ramble on so!
Holy no conflict, Batman! I do HATE a letdown like that.
Wow, that’s a huge letdown, Maya!! Think I’d hurl it myself.
Headhopping? Oh, if it the POV changes back and forth a lot during a scene. One change I can deal with, two at most. But I do require line breaks (as you know) between the changes. 🙂
Well, I can only say thanks that mine doesn’t drive you TOO nutty! LOL. Not that I’m a crazy insane head hopper. Just a mild one.
My pet peeves include the ones you mentioned, Maisey. I will NOT finish a book if the hero or heroine sleeps with other people in the story. In fact, I read a Modern Heat where the suggestion was there that this is what the hero did while trying to get over the heroine. He stopped being a hero for me, right then and there. Boy, was it a huge disappointment when the heroine forgave him so easily for that.
Head hopping – hmm, it’s all in the execution for me. If it pulls me out of the story by making me read back to make sure I know whose POV it’s from – no good.
My pet peeve is when a hero puts the heroine down. Her looks, her body, her personality. I especially hate (and some Presents novels are guilty of this) when the hero has such hatred for a heroine he calls her a ‘slut’. Can’t stand it.
I’ll shut up now lest I offend anyone.
I do not like the constant slut refrain either, Angie.I can see it working in some cases, as it’s great to me when an author doesn’t pull their punch and someone just says something nasty, because hey, we all get mad and say stupid things. But I detest it when it practically becomes the heroine’s nickname, and she never says a thing about it, and the hero is a giant man-whore anyway. Comes back to that execution thing, I suppose!
And yeah, unheroic behavior is not good.
I hate heroine’s who are pathetic. Often they find themselves in difficult situations, and are forced to ‘Marry that prince’ or ‘stay on the island’, but I want to see a spark of self worth, even if its been eroded by circumstance. It has to come from inside the heroine, rather than just be because the hero boosts her self esteem.
You hit on the very things that will have me throwing books. But missed the no hero POV. If an author wants me to like the hero, you better shift POV. I want to know what he is thinking and what his motivation is, otherwise I am likely going to view him as a total jerk. At least any alpha male will be viewed as a total jerk. For me it seems to be a universal, knee jerk reaction.
Weak heroines that couldn’t find their own way with a map and GPS! Whining, sniveling heroines are a total turn off.
What I do like is a book that has well balanced characters and the shift between POV is executed well. That author will end up on my autobuy list. 😉
It’s a small thing, but it drove me crazy…
The short story I just read is littered with exclamation points. Every time someone speaks, or just thinks, all I hear in my head is shouting because of all the !!!
It’s like when someone writes an email all in caps.
Keep it down already!!!
And those exclamation points above, were intentional and appropriate. 😉
I get turned off by loads of things. Dull or tasteless covers, for instance, something which is completely out of the author’s control.
In the actual writing, stupid little details that are just plain wrong, or that make you think WHAT? (Especially when it’s about basic child care and it’s clear the author has no kids, lol, or had them forty years ago!)
I don’t mind unpleasant heroes, having been brought up on Lamb novels, lol. But you do need to feel they’ve been deeply hurt etc in the past, which explains why they’re so mean now!
Weak-kneed heroines who sit there and colourlessly take whatever the hero and/or other characters throw at them. Or heroines who are just plain bitchy and mean, and are totally unsympathetic.
I don’t mind multiple partners, oddly enough, if for instance the heroine is married to some other man who she doesn’t love. (This happens a lot in historicals, so I’m probably just used to the concept.)But obviously if they’re both sleeping around, that’s going to be off-putting to most readers, because then you’re moving into erotica and away from romance, frankly. (I’ve written erotica myself, and multiple partners can be the norm in some of those!)
Erm, don’t throw the Kindle though, however disgruntled you get. Bit of an expensive mistake, that. 😉
Sally, I agree with you on the weak kneed heroines! And if she’s going to start that way due to past circumstances, I want to see her empowered, not put down. And I want to see her grow.
Nancy, I’ll read a book with one POV, but it irritates me. Mostly because I see it as a plot device. If we’re being kept out of someone’s head it’s usually for a reason. If I’m a few chapters in and no hero, my first thought is…oh, he’s madly in love with her already, but treating her mean so she doesn’t know, and we’re not in his head so we don’t know. But I always know. 🙂
Jessica!! I don’t know what you’re talking about!!! !! !! 🙂 Okay, yeah, that can be jarring. Anything that pulls you out of the story is BAD.
Jane, I’ll start saying my prayers for a good cover now! 😉 A colorless heroine is a tragedy. As I’ve said in some of my posts on alpha males, I think it’s better when the heroine challenges him, otherwise it seems bullyish. I like to see her give as good as she gets! Not to the point of endless bickering either though. That gets old too!
(My Kindle is safe!)
Hi Maisey! Biggest pet peeve? Well all of mine has already been hit upon. My biggest is of course wimpy heroines. I read a book where there was this woman who was supposedly a warrior and capable of defending her lands against marauding men. Yet the moment she meets the hero, she is always crying and complaining about everything. I was like, where is the warrior?
Alpha males are hot! LOL. I love BDSM books but find they only work for me if the woman isn’t a simpering fool. I like a woman who almost always fights against being domineered.
I don’t mind sexual sharing but it has to be the point of the book. I read one about a married couple who shared a man. I found it to be quite hot. But, I have read books about adultery that made me sick. I guess I am just weird that way.
Rape is another HUGE no-no. I was reading a book for review and it was outstanding. I was loving every moment of it. Then about 3/4 of the way through there was a rape scene. A very detailed rape scene. Which is an automatic NO-NO in our reviewing rules. We don’t review rape books. I was soooo frustrated.
The last big pet peeve I have is stupid women and men. LOL. I don’t mean stupid as in not very smart educationally. I mean stupid as in “why the hell would you do that?” I read a book by a well known author years and years ago. This woman gets cancer, has a masectomy. Her husband says he can’t handle it. Leaves her. Neighbor is there for her through chemo, throwing up, holding her hair, etc etc. The sweetest man. After she gets reconstructive surgery and new breasts, her husband comes back and says he is ready for a new relationship. And the stupid woman went back to him! Left her lovely neighbor, who slept with her when she had no breasts mind you! AHHHHH It made me sooo angry. I have not read any of the author’s work since. I refused to. I was sooo disappointed.
Biggest turn on for books now? That is Humor! I love love love humor in my books! Wanted to end my rantings on a positive note! LOL.
I see what you’re saying, Danielle. A book that has the focus on ‘sharing’ has different rules than a traditional romance. When the rules are changed, in the book, it’s not adultery in the same sense. (in the book world at least!;-)
I’ll have to check some of your reviews out!
No reviewing books with rape scenes, Danielle? That’s an odd one. It seems to me that such a rule means women can’t write about rape without being punished for it. Isn’t rape enough of a punishment without us devising a rule to stop it being discussed?
FWIW.
This won’t actually get me throwing a book around, but it does annoy me muchly. Why is it, if there’s a baby in the book the art dept can’t manage to get its sex right?! I once read a book with a boy, female on the cover–complete with dress.
Also, not in that particular book, but a linked book, a secondary character changed her name half way through. In the next book, she was back to the first name again. Waaaay confusing.
Again, won’t actually make me throw a book but if it doesn’t grab me in the first few pages I may never pick it up again.
@ Jane Holland: I guess I should have clarified more. I have read and reviewed books where rape is mentioned. But there is a difference between a woman discussing her being the victim of rape and a man doing the actual attacking. It isn’t so much when a rape is mentioned, it is how far the details go into it. I have read books where the woman is recounting an attack but it really is stated in a different voice then say a rapist.
I really hate it when the main character (usually a girl with this situation.)has multiple partners, and loves all of them. Sometimes she loves one of them but likes sex with all of them at the same time so says nothing to the one guy she loves. The main character in a book i recently read a excerpt from had multiple partners, they happened to also be brothers. I really disliked this scenario. The love scene was with all the partners and the main girl. (3 brothers were the partners). It was gross and make me really angry. I wanted to throw the book at the girls head and give her a mild concussion. Sorry if this hurts anyones feelings. That is not my intention. From the excerpts i was reading this situation was very common and i just really hate it. It super upsets me.
Sarah, no offense here. The multiple partner thing doesn’t say ‘romance’ or ‘love’ to me. I’m a monogamy sort of girl.